this is me.living my life.

Wedding Bellsss!!

2012-01-25T00:47:00.000-08:00

Let the count down begin!

I can literally start crying this very moment with excitement for everything. I cannot wait to go through the temple, I cannot wait to be Mrs. Stevenson, I cannot wait to finally call someone mine. I cannot wait to start a family. I cannot wait to start living. This past week has been so much better, the anxiety and panic has subsided and I am back to working on the wedding plans. I am so eager to just have it here already. Today I went to LA with my friend Bea and my sister Grace to get the materials we need for decorations. We got a few things for a realllyyy good price that will definitely enhance the look of our wedding reception. I am So excited to get things done and just be married and just be so in love. I already am, I just can't wait to take it to that next level, 'naw means ;) HA. anywho, Mona's family is teaching me a Samoan Taulunga that I will be dancing that day, i'm so nervous that I'll mess it up and insult culture so i'm trying so hard to learn and be patient on how to do things. His culture is so beautiful, so soft and so awesome. I love me my Samoans! :) Anywho, I have had so much fun doing a lot of things myself lately, I made my own garter today, which looks SO good! I made the necklaces for my bridesmaids, and I'm working on a few things to do on our own, I'm really diggin' this DIY stuff! Thank you Pinterest for all the wonderful ideas! :) Anywho, Only 3 weeks to go!!!! So excited!!!

Thanks for the love,

Miss Mayra D.

Feel free to check out some of my pictures!

http://lightbox.com/photos

wedding stress. work worries. anxiety scares. one week of misery.

2012-01-19T21:35:00.000-08:00

I hate having an anxiety problem. I really don't like it what so ever. This past week and a half has been one of the most stressful scary weeks i've had since probably high school. I had some serious irrational anxiety provoken thoughts, I was acting like such a mental and honestly I don't know what in my rational mind made me feel semi sane because i was becoming insane. Its done. First off, i will never EVER watch a R rated movie, scary movie, ever again. I made a huge mistake of freaking my soul out after watching a movie that to this very second shakes my core just thinking of. NEVER AGAIN. I honestly spent a week of my lovely so excitiing time of life in a stressful inner mental state of shake and fear. I swear i feel so bad for Mona to have to deal with me last week, no wedding plans were put into progress due to my stressed out state of mind. I guess you can say that the stress and fear all combined and just broke me down completely and I was just a huge emotional mess. I'd say I probably had like 3 panic attacks a day, EVERYTHING and anything made me cry, I was just destroyed. The ONE AND ONLY thing i'm soooo extremely OMG THANKFUL for having in my life is my LOVELY SAVIOR and Heavenly Father. Honestly, he was there, silently, but he was there the entire time. At night, when it would be hard to sleep, i'd blast my hymns and just pray so hard for me to feel better. The last thing I want is to be an anxious freak during my first year of marriage, I JUST WANT TO BE HAPPY! :) Mona is so great too, he was sooo supportive during all of my freak out moments, of course it is so hard for him but i'm so glad to know i'll be marrying a man that will support me in all aspects of me. I love him so much.

Last week i turned 25 :( oh man. I AM OLD! But that whole night i was full of anxiety so it wasn't the 25th birthday I envisioned. My mom threw me a Bridal shower on saturday and all of her friends came over and we had a good time. It was in all spanish so don't be mad if you had no idea but it was family and friends mostly.

Anywho, the wedding plans are going great, only one month to go! WOOT WOOT! so stoaked and just ready to finally have a HUSBAND, an eternal companion! :) YAY for never being alone any more! :) i cannot wait to be his wife! I was just reading back on blogs from last year and man, last year was SOOO though on me! I will never forget the trial that 2011 was, no wonder i had anxiety so bad to kick off this year, lol. Anywho, hopefully life will be full of blessings once we walk through those temple doors. I cannot wait to be sealed FOR TIME AND ALL ETERNITY. I just cannot wait to walk through those doors! Man, I'm going to cry some great tears! :)

I cannot believe how my life just fell into place so well, I am so trully blessed for everything I have in my life. Such a supportive and loving family, a strong family I will be joining ( i really hope Mona and I build a family structure like his family bc they are SO close) and just life is going to be great! Anywho, life is better now, I'd say my anxiety isn't so persistant, life isnt cloudy and scary like it was last week but i'm still in process onto full recovery! Nothing I cannot overcome with the help of the most amazing and loving HF ever. He gives me the strength i need to get by day by day!

With love,

Mayra D.

2012!

2012-01-02T23:52:00.000-08:00

Can you believe it is here? I honestly don't know where 2011 went but boy was it A YEAR!! so much happened in 2011, the good, the bad the ugly and the UNBELIEVABLE! :) Last year i made a top ten fashion list or something like that of 2010, but this year I want to do the most memorable things of 2011. There were a few good, a few bad but definitely a year I will be thankful for for the rest of my life! So without further a do...

January

I turned 24, had the last ever Mayra D. Hau5 Party for my Birthday with my two best DJ Friends in all of the universe. I can definitely say that night was CRAZY, I'd never EVER had so many people at my house and in all honesty I didn't have the BEST time because I was too busy freaking out about the crowd, but defeinitely never will forget it!

February

My mom being in the hospital was definitely something that I didn't like at all but thankfully all of the fears that this month brought were strength builders. My mom is great now, she hasn't been back in the hospital since, her heart is healthier, she's loosing weight and is more aware of what she eats than ever before. I love this woman with ALL of my heart!

March

This month was fun, well, kind of! I had to make a pretty tough decision about something and ended up kind of loosing a close friend of mine. We threw miss Hannah a birthday party for her 21st this month, it was fun, we had a very good turn out and it was a successful night! March was one of those months you need to have to get you ready for what is to come next, its the Storm I guess you could call it.

APRIL

MOST IMPORTANTLY:LOVE HAPPENED

04.17.2011

I finally made it up for EDP

Went to my FIRST Fashion show

evita.hannah.meeeeeeeeee.gary.

MAY

Talked about the future with someone

This month was a little difficult though, I remember having

a lot of anxiety this month. I had just got sent to a different

store at work and it was all too much for me. I wasn't happy

with where I was working and I wanted out very soon!

JUNE

LA GALAXY

This month was very work based, Mona got

a job at puma, life started to get crazy with school

coming to an end and summer coming in! We headed

down to san diego for a fun day in la jolla. It was quite

the adventure!

July

August

We were both in the tahitian group in our wards dance show, It was so much fun learning all of the movement and doing a dance that is similar to Monas culture. I'm definitely hoping on joining in on a dance group this year!

September

Alyssa turned 21!! YAY! My sister Veronica let us

throw a party in her back yard, thank you! It was good times!

October

I was la Llorrona for halloween, it was definitely a good time!

November

ENGAGED!!!!!!!

FEBRUARY 18th 2012!!!!

So EXCITING to be engaged to amazing

Solomona Stevenson, we may not be perfect,

but our love is! :) I cannot wait to be married

to this man!

December

This month came and went so quickly, we did a lot of wedding planning and got a lot of things done this month. To this day there are still a few things that need to be situated but most of them should be fine. We took some engagements with one of our amazing friends Anna and Tegyn who both did such a good job on our photos and we loved how they turned out. This month I also tried to do a few different things with my style choices and hair do's. I started reading more fashion blogs and I really love going on Pinterest. We had a great Christmas with both of our families and then spent the 26th at Disneyland. New Years was okay at Dave n Busters, it was extremely crowded so we didn't have the BEST time that we would have had if it weren't so crowded. Life is going great, only 47 more days until the wedding, Only 47 more days until marriage; I cannot wait!

Live with a smile,

and shine like the sun.

Enjoy life always!

Mayra d.

the month that has passed...

2011-12-14T17:18:00.001-08:00

I swore I had updated the blog a while ago, but apparently i thought wrong. so, BIG NEWS... i'm engaged :) YAY!!! I get to spend the REST Of my LIFE ..and then some... with my best friend, the man i can tell anything and everything, the man that supports every decision I make, the one that kisses my forehead on a daily basis and tells me i'm pretty. The one person that can make fun of me and love every one of my silly blond rediculousness... I know i'm going to have so much fun being married to him! We got engaged on November 17th, our 7 month anniversary :) We went up to this gorgeous cliff in Ranch Palos Verdes, theres a little park that overlooks all of the pacific.The view was gorgeous, It was a cloudy day so we were able to see the blankets of clouds covering the sky below. It was phenominal! Then mona started being super cute, he started to say the cutest things like how much he loved me and how he had waited for this day for such a long time. And then he pulled out the box, and I pulled out my SMILE! :) he got so red and was like "ah i don't know why I'm so nervous right now"-- got on a knee and asked "Mayra De La O, will YOU marry me??"

let me think about that for a second... YESSS!?!??!?! hahah

yay! :) we are so excited, nervous,anxious ready and just want to be married like already. I can't wait to be able to grow with him, to learn and to start my life with him. I know one of the biggest things I look forward to is starting a family. I can't wait for that opportunity! The wedding plans are coming along! :) We have our engagements done, also our invitations, the first of 7 bridesmaid dresses has come in, it is GORGEOUS, we have a photographer, videographer, location, mariachi, food, and we just need to find a decorator and we are completely ready! :) I've been just focusing daily on this so that it works well! His immediate family is flying in from Sydney in February, I cannot wait to meet them! So excited! :)

So to update on that Wells Fargo Interview, I GOT THE JOB!!! :) I honestly will never forget that interview, it was crazy and so funny all at once! I'm at the lynwood location and I start as a teller this monday, I've been training for 3 weeks now! I quit windsor the monday before black friday so I have every sunday off from now on!! WOO HOO!!! Life is good, I'm at my sisters house in torrance, I'm trying to come up with a routine for my little nephews and nieces to dance to at our wedding. It's going to be so cute! I cannot wait!! Anywho, remember to focus on the eternal, and how things now affect things later, DON'T give up on yourself, always remember who is the most important and that is HF. He is #1 always!

xoxo

Mayra D. :)

New Beginnings...

2011-11-09T23:28:00.000-08:00

I'm pretty exhausted, but i'm forcing myself to write this down, even if no one ever reads this, I HAVE TO TELL THIS STORY! Or atlease write it down to remember all the details, It's pretty long but I promise it is pretty funny at the end... or atleast I think so..

A few months ago I applied for a teller position with Wells Fargo, probably about 3 months ago. I went through the first few interviews and passed the phone interviews, but i couldn't seem to get into an actual interview slot. I was messing up on a lot of things during that time, I wasn't really going to church (not by choice) but because I was being scheduled to work from 1 to 10 every sunday. I had even put in my 2 week notice but because i had no job to secure me financially, i took it all back. Our store ended up doing horribly for inventory, My store manager quit and to top it all off, one of our Assistant managers got injured and never came back. It was all me to fend for the store until our new store manager would come in from Arizona. A few horrendous corporate visits from our VP and DM made me realize how i could work a little harder and give a little more effort to make this better.

I looked at how i was living and how i was making excuses for EVERYTHING, I was sad all of the time, I just didn't understand why things didn't seem fair in anything that I did. Even Mona was getting it from me, I was just a mess. Then I looked at the bigger picture, What was missing? why was i so sad, so confuzed and so hopeless in all the things that were easily manageable. i'd done it before?Where had my faith gone? It was at that moment that I realized how much I was doing was wrong or just throwing a BIG pitty party. I was tired of having to work sundays, I was tired of messing up, I was tired of giving in to temptation. I was just tired of everything. So I said sorry, REALLY sorrry.

.. its really nice that during this time you have a very understanding boyfriend who will help you get through the hard times, even if we had our trials, we got through every one. He is my best friend and the one person who understands so much about me but at the same time can drive me NUTS :) i'm sure he feels the same way at times. But i love him so much, he is my world.

I prayed a lot, I talked to bishop and I cryed away all my fears and just stepped it up. In that next week, I got an email from Wells fargo to call for an appointment slot for a group interview, I had been in that process for about 2 months and all appointments were being filled up quick. That morning was different, THEY ACTUALLY HAD AN OPEN SLOT! I hadn't gotten my schedule at Windsor but i booked it for the coming week anyways. I was able to get the day off and go to my interview. There were 15 people, all eager as me to get this job. Only a few of us really stuck out and I left the interview feeling really good about my performance. About 2 weeks later I would get an email telling me that I had made it to my final interview process! YAY! Which would be Tuesday Nov. 8th at 1030 AM. It would be in Downtown LA, yes that big building in Dwntown. I was pretty excited to be heading into the city for a big girl interview. It felt really cool in all honesty.

MORNING OF... THIS IS WHERE IT GETS INTERESTING...

So I woke up and got ready for my interview, I made sure to pick out my outfit the night before, I was done doing that late stuff so i woke up and left my house at 915 to get to LA. I live like 30 minutes from downtown, NBD right? So Since It was a little early i figured getting an iced Chai to calm my nerves would be a good idea. I got on the 105 at 935, thinking it would be enough time, only to find myself sitting in morning traffic, WTH? I thought it ended at 9 am? WRONG. SO here i am, freaking out because I want to be IN the building by 1020. I jump on the 710N and thank goodness no traffic. I'm on the 5N in no time, 950ish and kaboom, TRAFFIC. Urg, so closeee! Traffic was HORRIBLE on the 5 to the 101 which is where i had to be, It took about 10 minutes to get to the 101 and from there I had to go to spring street which was ONLY 3 miles away, yea, that means 15 minutes in traffic. SO here i am, screaming freaking out because I'm like runnig late, i'm nervous, let the panic attack arive, just what i needed right? WRONG. So i get off on spring at 1020, head to the so called parking lot that the wells fargo recruter said would have a shuttle to get to the building. So they lied, it was 12 bucks, not ten, so i gave the guy all my change which was probably 1150 or so, give me a break. I ask about this so called shuttle, but he had no idea what I was talking about. At this point i was like F it i'll just walk. So I ask the guy where the wells fargo was at and he pointed me west, I kind of had a feeling of taking my flats to walk but I was like nah, i'll be good in my 4 inch heels.WRONG.

10 minutes until interview,

I walk down spring street only to find that he had pointed me towards ATM machines from wells fargo FML. SO i asked someone directions to the Wells Fargo tower, 4 blocks up 4th street... ???? WHAT! its 1023 now... so I decided to book it, I literally started running in my heels, BAD IDEA. I was good, then i feel a slight slip and hear a tear... "omg.. i'm falling i'm falling i'm falling shoooootttt... omg i'm goonna cryyyy" right in front of a sandwich shop where everyone was waiting for me to hit the ground, but i made it.. lol. I decided to take off my shoes and just RUN, So here i am, wearing a blazer, a cute top, a skirt, BAREFOOT in Downtown Los Angeles. I made sure to watch evvery step i took, no siringes, no gross stuff, just pavement... I found 4th street, went up 2 blocks and put my shoes back on, thinking it would be good from there, I was already late, it was 1030 on the dot. I crossed the street, only to find A HILL!!! A FREAKING HILL!! omg... KILL me.. this is the interview from HELL.. lol. So, I take of my shoes, because THERE IS JUST NO WAY, and i book it up there, mind you its like 70 plus

degrees at this point so i'm like sweating. I find a nice man who walked up to the Wells fargo tower

area and pointed me in the right direction. Of course I went to the wrong enterance and had to go all the way

around to FINALLY make it. it was 1040 AM. 10minutes late BUT thankgoodness they were running

late so it was nothing to them. I was ahot mess, and everyone else seemed to look ready and nice,

I was not happy. I got some water, cooled down and did my all.

Today, I found out I got the job. THANK YOU HF! All of that trouble and it all paid off,

I guess a rule of thumb is to ALWAYS prepare for traffic in LA, and NEVER wear 4 inch stilletos

to an interview.

The end.

Six.

2011-10-17T19:34:00.001-07:00

Life is so pleasant, even when things are difficult

when things don't go your way, you learn that

the most important thing is the people who

love being by your side.

I couldn't be happier,

finally a love that is unconditional

finally a love that can last forever

finally someone worth getting through the fights for

finally someone to call MINE.

Today marks six months since Mona and I started dating, which is really exciting! So much has happened in these six months, so much to grow from, so much knowledge and so much adventure!

I love how he looks at me, I love how he knows when something is wrong, I LOVE how he loves me, I love how i can look like a hot mess and he smiles, and says i look beautiful. Since day 1, we've been the biggest cheeseballs, but since day 1, he's had my heart. I'm looking forward to the next few months and what comes our way, what obstacles we'll face, what happiness will bring, what adventures we will take, what risks we'll be taking.

This weekend was one much needed, Thursday, we spent all day together, I got my hair cut and then we went and saw 50/50 which was a pretty great movie! Friday, he got off work early and surprized me at home so we went and danced at El Dorado's dance. Its so much fun being on the dancefloor with that boy, its like nothing else matters... really.

Saturday we went and did laundry together, lol, we're trying to be "grown ups" but it was nice to sit and just conversate with him. I swear when we get married we're going to be that newspaper couple, sipping on some OJ reading about the 99% of the population being broke arses. I find it cute, but he always makes conversation so easy, even if we disagree, its so easy just to talk. After laundry we went to mama's sushi where i tried ALBACORE for the first time, now let me tell you, flavorgasm. That was a good meal though, after that we went over to his aunty and uncles house for a bbq, his cousin Justin who plays for Notre Dame came into town so we went and just chilled with his family. Its nice to be welcomed like they do, they're really nice! I always tell him that when we have a family I want us to have the samoan family bond like his family does. I mean, mexican families are way close too, but not like his family seems to be. Anywho, that was fun, we talked about the gospel with his other cousin for a few hours actually, that was probably the best part of the night, sitting with Mona and talking about how people are around the world and how Jesus Christ affects their lives in such a positive way when they are open and willing to listen to a message of Christ. After that we went home and fell asleep, I was pretty exhausted.

Sunday came and we headed to El Dorado, and for the first time in a really long time, we made it to church on time! :) you think girls take forever to get ready, meet my Bf, omg... lol. anywho. Church was great, the talks were great. It was so nice to be back at church. I've been working every sunday for the past 2 months so its been REALLY hard to get to church and really take advantage of the blessing of the sabbath. Ironically, we had to leave early to head over to Lomita and get my nephew Alex so we could head to the LA Galaxy Game vs. Chivas USA. It was fun, Alex was able to run around the field before the game started so it was great to see that! The game was great, Galaxy took the victory. I was exhausted after so we went back to mona's and watched Apocalypto on Netflix. That movie is crazy! I fell asleep in loving arms and thats how my sunday ended.

Today was a good one too, Today is our actual 6 month anniversary and we went to Zavalas for some tacos for lunch. I dropped him off at work, which is always the saddest thing, I swear I could be with this boy 24/7 without getting "sick of him" haha. Maybe he does, but I sure don't!

Anywho, things are so good! I have an interview with Pepsi Co. for a customer service rep tomorrow at 1 so i'm really HOPING and PRAYING that I get this job. It's $1 more than I currently make and 1/2 way closer than I work now! Pray for me please! School is alright, I need to focus because i'm definitely being a slacker ( I should be doing HW at this current moment) lol. Family is doing great, things are just at a good place right now! I know things will only get better with time, I can feel it! I'm ready for any challenge that comes my way!

With that,

keep smiling!

Chao!

love you. just the way you are.

2011-07-28T12:22:00.001-07:00

I could watch you for a lifetime
You’re my favourite movie
A thousand endings
You mean everything to me
I never know what’s coming
Forever fascinated
Hope you don’t stop running
To me cause I’ll always be waiting

You are A cinema I could watch you forever
Action Thriller I could watch you forever
You are A Cinema A Hollywood treasure
Love you Just the way you are
A Cinema A Cinema A Cinema
A Cinema A Cinema A Cinema

Stars spell out your name
Like in a science fiction drama
Romance roll in
Like a flower in the summer
You always keep me guessing
Forever my wonder
Hope you start undressing
All my dreams until the end of

http://www.hotnewsonglyrics.com/benny-benassi-cinema-lyrics.html

Never know what movie you’re playing
Never know what movie you’re playing
Never know what movie you’re playing
Never know never know never know

Reminescing

2011-07-13T23:55:00.000-07:00

Things are so different today. so different than they were 4 months ago. I was looking back on old blogs and re-reading the horrible time I was having when I published them. It honestly makes me so depressed to rethink of the time that was Jan-March 2011. What hell. I couldn't be happier today. Life is getting so exciting lately, I have an amazing man in my life who just knows how to love me, and gives me all of the things I could ever want from someone. He's my everything. Lately, I feel like that grown up girl i wanted to become a few months ago. I'm way more secure than I've ever been, and I am definitely way more in Love with someone than i've ever been.

A few weeks ago, Mona got a job working with my brother in law at Puma out in Torrance, he was placed on Swing shift, meaning his hours are from 4:30PM to 3:00 AM Monday thru Saturday. I'm dying over here. As things continue to escalade in our relationship, our time together seems to get less and less. We actually went and looked at rings yesterday. WOW.WOW.WOW.crazy i know, sooo exciting, most definitely. This boy is mine forever! Well, i need a ring to finalize that statement first but, it's definitely the goal we are working towards!! FINALLY. someone who understands me, who loves me, even my imperfections and insecurities. He loves me through it all. Finally a boy who isn't here to play games, a man with real emotions and someone who is selfless and gives of himself for my happiness. FINALLY.

I remember having a dream about a man who would be the father to my baby a few months ago and getting this feeling during the dream about how much of a stranger he was but how i knew that i loved him: Mona,has had a crush on me for a while and i've always had an attraction to him, but i always thought he was someone who wouldnt be interested in someone like me. apparently im very wrong. to continue with the dream, my "husband" in this dream loves me and the baby unconditionally: mona always puts me first. i may get insecure at times and grow fear of what could happen and if things don't work out how much i would die instantely, but i relate this feeling to that dream because thats the love i remember feeling in that dream! It's kind of crazy to relate what is going on now to what i dreampt about that night, but it makes so much sense. He always puts me first, and that's all ive ever wanted, to actually and geniounly be loved by someone who i love. to have true and real love, and i've found it.

I'm sooo thankful for standing in holy places, for following the spirit and for joining the LDS church. I'm no where near perfect, and i know perfection could never fully be reached but I do know that I am so happy now, knowing that life is the way it is because of the choice i made 3 years ago, to become a MORMON. to live like Heavenly Father would want me to live and to be closer to my savior. None of this wouldve happened if I weren't a member of this church, and i'm so thankful I made THAT giant leap and made THAT decision.

keep looking up :)

Mayra D.

eres la luz de mi vida...

2011-07-09T01:11:00.001-07:00

im a rapper sometimes...

Baby boy you my evrythang

cant believe you got me this diamond ring...

you everythang i been wishin for

got me fiening n i want some more...

eres todo lo que quiero,

para siempre

eres todo lo que quiero,

para siempre

eres todo lo que quiero...

nunca me dejes.

ay que guapo.

mi amor.

para siempre...

Because i love him...

2011-06-24T00:56:00.000-07:00

oh yes i sure do...

here he is, the man i love. the one that consumes all of my time, the one i cannot get sick of, okay sometimes, lol. the one i argue with. the one i cry with.the one i cuddle with.the one that i wanna be with for ever... yes. deep.don't judge me, i just know. :) i love this boy. a feeling like this hasn't entered my body since i joined the church.anywho, he deserves every second of your undivided attention right now, because, i say so. jk. lol. i love this boy. he's everything i could ever ask for. he's showing me so much of his soul and letting me grow with him. i love everything about him. he's just too good to be true... yea yea, sappy little love blogger now huh, but hey, so what!:) lol. i'm in love, and i'm not afraid to say it. i want to marry this boy. yea, i do. so what! :)

fin.

He is..

2011-05-16T00:32:00.000-07:00

everything i could ever ask for...

everything i could ever dream of...

the person that makes me want to be everything i've ever dreamed of....

the person i want to make better, i want to be like...

he is everything i've been waiting for..

lets just hope that its all in HIS will to work out...

life couldn't be better..

We've hit turbulence...

2011-03-26T23:55:00.000-07:00

and im one shaken little girl.

tonight, he broke me. completely.

it was the final cherry on the ever so building snow cone waiting to tip.

and he placed it.

things could be worse.

and i hope they don't get any worse.

it just so happens to trickle down sometimes.

this year started off "great"

new promotion.

new location.

more money..

one big happy mye mye...

what happened since then?

what has changed so significantly in my life that has drastically made my ever so happy temper slowly dull into a depressed little seventeen year old child..

i know where the problem lies.. just need to fix it and remember that trials will come.. and that's when we need to turn to him the most.

I can't do this on my own. and i think ive been neglecting the help i know i have way too much lately. I need to remember that he is always there. he is ALWAYS going to love me, even when the guy i wish wanted me dates someone else.. HF will ALWAYS love me. no matter what.

Park that car, drop that phone, sleep on the floor, dream about me.<3 i am like a seventeen year old at thismoment in my life. so i feel like i am. i am hurt, stressed and have too much to think about that my emotions take over.. i hate it...

so i dedicate this song to me..

Maturing Comes with age..

2011-03-15T22:36:00.000-07:00

And i'm getting old...

SO the last couple of months, my life has been pretty busy. With work and school I was definitely getting pretty tired and stressed out dealing with so many things. At home, my mothers health was crumbling, at work I had issues going on and at school the debates only got harder over time.

I am exhausted.

Never in my working life have I come home feeling so down on myself, so utterly lost and stressed out than i have in the past 2 months. I think this new position will be the death of me..

The past few months I have gotten closer to some friends that help me relieve that tension. I'm so thankful for them. Specifically miss Hannah who has understood and given some amazing advice on how to deal with things.. As i stated earlier, maturing comes with age (total lie) ...to me, It is a personal challenge. Sometimes, we don't mature until we are much older, sometimes we are forced to mature at a young age.. it is all due to a personal experience. I have matured, I think. I guess i base that off of the things that are most important to me lately. Family, HF, Friends, Work... Then the rest follows.. partying is not a priority.

Lately I feel like i'm ready to get on with my life.. midlife crisis? maybe.. well in a year right? I had a really vivid dream the other night where I was pregnant. My "babies daddy"(LOL) was a complete stranger, i didn't even know I knew him in my dream, but we were in love? it was weird. well, the dream continued and my boo became more supportive, buying baby stuff, telling friends, being really excited for the ever so fast growing baby in my overnight pregnancy.. I had the baby and we were in love.. i think the time lapse in my dream was 5 hours.. meaning that IN my dream i was pregnant and 5 hours later i gave birth..lol.. I had a boy, and he was perfect. he could talk, and he loved me.. he was full mexican, bushy eyebrows, perfect complexion and the cutest smile. His dad and I loved him so much so we took him to our house that we bought in .25 seconds (dream time is fast!!) The dream ended and I woke up feeling like a mom. I wasn't sure what the dream meant at all, but it was so real, and i felt so much emotion from it. I woke up with tears in my eyes, wondering why i would dream something so great and then wake up to a reality that is no where near it. I guess subconsciously i'm ready for that kind of love.. kinda sucks that its no where in sight right now, but Love takes time.. and it'll come when its supposed to.

I still wonder the meaning of that dream.. it's definitely one i will never forget..

Anywho, life is alright... taking it day by day.. just a little overworked and overstressed.. emotional mess at times.. but i'll get through it.. this is just another page of my book called life ;)

-Mayra

Right to a fair opinion..

2011-01-14T00:19:00.000-08:00

So, lately, i feel like my honest opinions don't matter. Like whatever I think, gets bypassed and however i feel about something is WRONG. Someone else is always right, and im wrong, and what i think is different and wrong, and there always has to be a friend finding random sources trying to be the "know it all." That btw is one of THE biggest and most annoying things a person can have as a quality in my personal opinion (if that even matters to you) bc apparently to many, my opinion doesn't matter.. so, since no one reads this anyway, here i am, letting YOU, invisible person out there, read about who i am, and how i fell about certain things..

I LOVE electronic music. I love it, so much. I've listened to plenty of electro for the past 4 years, dancing out in clubs in hollywood, raving it up at EDC with minors (weird) and just blasting it in my car on the way home from work. it is one of the most relaxing sounds for me, and i LOVE it. Electro to me is a huge genre; dubstep,drum and bass, house music, trance, nu-disco..all of that, is classified under electro in my book. Yes, you can argue with me on how they arent electro, and i know, they arent, but when i say that, i mean a BROAD range of music.

i HATE HATE HATE HATE HATE... (i think thats enough) when music goes mainstream without it being represented fairly. FOR EXAMPLE. Britney Spears released a song this week, that has a trance beat behind it. IT is straight up dance music, like from the grungy underground, plastered on a pretty face for the world to see... no no no.. to me.. this is a no no, and i understand, WTF, nbd Mayra D. but this is just how i FEEL about it. and my feelings need to be expressed right? so let me express them.. k, thanks! anywho, i posted a thing about it on my fb status, (here i go being a little bit overdramatic, but anywho...) and the whole thing turned into a discussion, which i should have expected, but it was not what i wanted. I understand the people feel that they should comment on it, but it was most definitely a vent on how i felt about something so passionate about. YES, i am an "electronic music fiend!!" meaning, i need it, i crave it, ALL of the time.. lol, so when someone like Britney plastered my "vice" all over the nation, that made me not happy. not mad, but more dissapointed at the lack of representation that the MAINstream media is doing for electro. Electronic music, the amazing stuff, is still no on the radio, its still free of charge on blogs, in zippyshare files, on twitter, but it is no where to be found on radio stations. SO that is what gets me mad. Britney, bc she's the "queen" can deface such amazing music ( to me) and people love it... i dont get it..

im not making sense,

oh well,

no ones listening.

Mayra D.

2010 in 10.

2011-01-04T23:32:00.001-08:00

Okay, so i know im like 6 days late of posting my favorite things of 2010, since we have moved into a new decade :) so here are my top 10 songs, fashion trends, icons, movies, reality tv people and parties. :)

10. Kloe Kardashian :)

Okay, so i know, why not kim? HELLO??? Khloe is HILARIOUS. omg, she makes me laugh every episode. I also admire that she runs her own store, sticks up for herself and is a little on the heavier side of life, and still manages to makes thinks look great. She has a fun personality and this year, charmed me into liking her, therefore, she is #10 on my "cool" celebrity list.

#9.JEGGINGS

Have you recently tried to squeeze your cute little bottom into a pair of jeans, only to feel like your butt is being sucked out, and a muffin top is definitely on the loose? well, no fear here, the jeggings are here to save. The wonderful spandex combinated with cotton and jean material has made it easier to fit into your pants without the worry of a muffy top. :) thank goodness for jeggings and their comfortable fit, they are defintily staying in 2011.

#8. LOST

Okay, so i must admit, the ending was extremely dissapointing to me, i expected something elaborated, great explanation for why these things happened to these people, but no, death. that is all it was, it was death.

#7.EDP (Electric Dance Parties)

Okay so i have to state that i have YET to attend an EDP, but for the record, i am pretty close with the founder of this amazing dance party group based in Provo Utah. Their movement is amazing for the location they are based in, a college town. Who wouldn't want to party for free? Of course, super mo's might consider it a rave, but these DJ's are trying to expose a music genre that most people have yet to really listen to. I give them a good round of applouse for their hard work, and place them #7 on my 2010 list of awesome.

#6 Steve Aoki

Mr. Kid Millionaire himself is just known for partying all around Los Angeles. As i scoped through my many video clips of 2010 and i noticed that this year was a little more party for me, and it all seemed to take place at one club :Cinespace. Tuesdays nights is DIM MAK nights, DIM MAK is Aoki's label and they throw weekly parties in LA for the electro loving hipster crowd. I do love me some cinespace, and am so glad for steve Aoki who spread the party love in 2010 to me :)

#5 TWILIGHT.

can you say, YUM? okay, okay i know, i need to workout a little more in order to get a guy that looks as physically great as these 4 hotties, but twilight sure did keep me away from any activity other than reading this summer. I did an internship in Beverly Hills and after all the traffic and hard work, i would come home, sip on some hot cocoa and call it a twilight night. I was HOOKED, this story is amazing, finishing it in 2 weeks is a first for me, specially with reading something like this. 4 books, 2 weeks, must have been easy reading. but boy was it amazing. can't wait until november when the first part of the final installment of these movies comes out :)

#4 DUBSTEP

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aVgGte6vlic&feature=player_embedded#!

(cassius)

OMG. dubstep. SO good. SO this year, I indulged into some crazy new music.A little more in depth of what you could say "electro" and merged into the subgenres of this music, only to find more beauty hiding in the underground. Dubstep is dirty, grungy and all about rage, but it didnt really fuel my anger, it just let me express it within dance. Thank you dubstep, you definitely saved some poor people from a Mayra D. nose punch. ;) jk. but really, Cassius and Pendulum definitely topped the charts for me on the dubstep/d&b sounds for me. :)

#3. DucK Sauce

of course, leave the last few #'s to the music genre's that rocked my world:DISCO HOUSE. One of my favorite bands in this spectrum was DucK sauce. Not really a band, more of a collaboration of producers.A-Trak and Arman Van Helden are the front runners of this Disco House fueled collab and Barbra Streisand (one of the most amazing songs of 2010 in MY book)was produced by these two along with Anyway (which came out in '09) but continues to tickle my fancy :) make sure to check them out...

http://vimeo.com/15367744

#2 EDC (electric Daisy Carnival)

never in my life would i have ever imagined a dance party so huge in my life. besides the nudity, drugs, alcohol and other nasty "worldly" things that go on at these "MegaRaves" i was there for one thing and ONE thing only, MUSIC. wow. can i just say that words could not express how amazing it sounds and feels to be submerged in a place with so much crazy energy. The insane thing of it all is that you are kind of put in this field where everyone is basically out of their minds, literally, and so you have to make it fun without getting into any of the crap that they're on, if you get what im saying. I am SO lucky to be as strong of a member and faithful to my HF to not be even remotely tempted to step back into the alcohol scene, or be tempted to buy drugs or do ANY of those things. I party clean, and that is the ONLY way i will ever party. Music is amazing to me, and i love it and i was so glad to see so many artists come together over a 2 day period to bring forth good and new music for us sober "i will NEVER forget this" crowd that doesnt need any kind of "stuff" to have a good time.

We also found a kid there that was LDS, and he had this amazing shirt that said "LDS hardcore, HUG DON'T DRUG" all over it. it was amazing. such wonderful times with wonderful friends :)

#1 A*TRAK!!!!!!!

Of course right? leave the #1 spot to not only the most attractive DJ in the electronic world, but also one of the most amazing scratchers/producers/partier in all of the US of A, even if he is from Canada! So i've known of A*TRAK for about 4 years but not until this year did i really indulge in his mixes and appreciate the artwork he does. He has these mixtapes where he mixes electro and hip hop and blows it up on the dance floor. He is amazing to see live, he'll definitely keep you dancing all night. I was privelaged to see him live both at EDC and at cinespace back in october. He's the founder of Fools Gold record label based in NYC and has an older brother in Chromeo (an electro synth pop Band) Check them out :) Anywho, he gets #1 for his attractive charisma, charming whit and my uber cute DJ groupie crush on him LOL. yes. i am his biggest fan! hahahahaha....

Okay, well there you have it. my top 10 of 2010. I guess these things really did influence and impact my year on a fun level. I'm really looking forward to increasing my faith and spirituality in 2011 and finally settling down and getting everything done before i grow too old to do it. Of course, parties and good times with great friends are ALWAYS on the agenda, just got to prioritize a whole lot better in 2011..

so this is CHRISTmas

2010-12-24T01:35:00.000-08:00

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!

Well, another year has come and gone! I can't say much about this year, i guess not much exciting happened, besides being alive and having Christ in my life, things stayed the same. I cannot believe that CHRISTmas is here already. I love how a few of my friends have posted it as "CHRISTmas" around all of their fb's and twitters, it really reminds me of how amazing this holiday is and the changes it does to people.

I remember as a little girl going to church on Christmas day, and looking up at the nativity scenes on the church's stage. It was always a time when i felt the happiest, where my family came together and we just loved one another. I know that those days prepared me for days of today, actually tomorrow, to know the TRUE importance of CHRISTmas. it all lies within the name, CHRIST. if you translate it in spanish, you get "navidad" but if you say "CHRISTMAS" it can mean "more CHRIST". I guess thats what we should see it as on Christmas. A day that we want more of CHRIST in our lives.

2 and a half years ago, i joined THE CHURCH OF JESUS CHRIST OF LATTER DAY SAINTS, commonly known as the "mormon" church, or the LDS church. all 3 work, but its the ACTUAL name of it that hits my heart so hard. THE CHURCH OF JESUS CHRIST. wow.just in the name, i can feel so much presence of him, and i absolutely LOVE it. These 2 1/2 years have been quite a learning experience, and i've never felt closer to my savior than i do now. Its pheonominal how much faith can place you in the right path of life, and help you realize what life IS all about. I absolutely love where my life is going now, before, i wasn't so sure. but now, i know where i need to get. I love that i have a loving heavenly father who has been there for me since day 1. i remember as a little girl praying to my "God" not really knowing how much my prayer would be heard, but having the faith that he was listening. I've always knew that my father loved me.ALWAYS. i'm so thankful for my parents and the amazing life they gave me. I've always been unconditionally loved by the both of them, and i could never thank them enough. it's just amazing how everything in life works out, one way or another, you will always find happiness, AS LONG as the means of that happiness come through good works and faith in your heavenly father. I love how much this gospel has changed my life. I may have faced my trials, and have given in to temptation, but i know that i have the chance to repent and learn from those mistakes.

This holiday season, remember what the true meaning of CHRISTmas is, keep him in your life, and you will be eternally happy. I promise, and know that he loves us all, after all, he did die for our sins, for our happiness and for our chance to be with our father in heaven again. Don't let all that sacraficing go unnoticed on his very special day. :)

much love

Mayra D.

so good.soo good.

2010-09-16T23:53:00.000-07:00

So it's been quite some time since i wrote in this lovely thing! This past month has been completely amazing, and so different than the month before. :) I feel like this month, i finally got the summer i wanted, going out with friends, attending church activities, working, starting school, just a lot of things going on in a good amount of time. I guess it's all thanks to a whole lot of praying and listening and being where i should be. I finally have gotten most sundays off, i have monday wednesday nights off (fhe,institute) and thursday nights (temple) so i'm just feeling so great being able to attend most church functions, i mean, since that's really where i want my life to be. :) I've also made some new friendships with people, i fixed my car ($1,000 later, runs a lot better) so i started school last month, im taking 4 classes: Mass comm, film 1, marketing comm and dance aerobics :) all of which i have fun taking, because they are interesting courses that i don't mind going to class for. The only thing is that just like my car, i spent a whole lot of money on them.lol. but im loving it, i love working out, its the best feeling ever, i wouldnt mind taking an aerobics class again, as long as it keeps me in shape :) work is going great, selling my little heart out is the best, specially when its with people that are way chill! anywho, boyz, oh those boys and their mixed signals and stuff. i just dont understand them sometimes, but whatever. there is one, who is on my mind a little bit, but who knows, i have no idea, i have a little bit of hope for it, but am not tooo worried about it. lol. he's rad. lets just say that, but a little distant. so idk, ihave no clue. our ward is growing, we have some really cool new people in our ward that i spend a lot of time with, currently, my new friend bret and i tend to drive everywhere together so its way cool to have new people that 1. live close by, and 2. love to have a good time. OH so heres some fun new news, IM GOING TO GENERAL CONFRENCE!!! :D im SOOOOOOo excited, last time we went was last year, it was alyssa and i with robroy, so it was way super chill. now im going with robroy and a few other people. im staying with my newest friend sharon, which is going to be rad bc the [E][D][C] are going to PAAARRRTAYYY! :) im super stoaked for it! :) of course im looking forward to confrence of all things, but its just the fact that i will be there with my closest friends, in the most amazing environment that is MORMON WORLD :) lol. i've had some seriously amazing experiences this month, and i feel like my life is how it should be. I love that after trials that we have that really break us down a little bit, we find happiness and love given to us from our Loving heavely father. I'm sooooo thankful for having what i have and knowing what i know, because without it, i don't know what i would be doing, or how my life would be. I'm just extremely greatful for everything i have now :) thats all :) <3>

The [E][D][C] [electric dancing crew]

[aarow.aaron.ryan d]

[sharon,me,rachelle]

[a.fronky]

[bret & i] THUG LIFE..CTR :]

life is good.life is GREAT ;]

EDC.TWILIGHT.BONFIRES AND SO MUCH WORK.

2010-08-16T00:59:00.000-07:00

It has been quite a while since i blogged, so i figured i might as well get on this thing and get you all caught up on my oh so busy life that i had this summer. It all started late May, when i decided to intern for a Boutique in Beverly Hills, WHILE working full time at Windsor's out in Torrance. I was lucky enough to work with some really amazing people out in BH that taught me a lot about what i'm getting myself into with this PR stuff. I'm really excited to work for a PR firm some day and have my own clients that i can help with Marketing their products and throwing events for them. It seems like Windsor is also giving me that same opportunity in the next few month's (im the districts PR intern now) wahooo..... so i won't be getting a break like i want anytime soon. I was really busy with work all summer, and the fact that the driving distances from work and home are so extreme in traffic, i seemed to be limited on my social time all summer. I think for about a month straight, I didn't go out as often or hang out with people because i was either in traffic, off work late, or too tired to do anything. HOW LAME IS THAT?!?! pretty lame!

well I went to EDC back in June, it was SO much fun. 2 days of electro isn't enough for me. I loved ever second of it. i mean, who wouldnt love 48 hours of good music and dancing? i have tons of pictures on my FB ( check em out at http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=188101&id=515319181) ....

but thats seriously most of what i did, so about 3 weeks ago, i broke down and had enough, i couldn't be at home anymore, not after all the fun i saw people having, i had to do something. And thankfully, i had friends waiting for me to get back into the groove of things. I hung out with derek and a few kids, went on bike rides, went to bonfires, went dancing and met some really awesome people from all over sunny so cal! :) There were definitely some parties that i went to and had a blast, and some where just okay.

Here is the big reason why i went a little social shy, ha, TWILIGHT. i spent 2 weeks of this summer consumed in the Saga that people have been over for a few years. I had so much fun reading these books because they made me remember high school and that teenage dream crush that we all had and made into reality. It's a good book, i definitely don't regret spending most of my nights locked in my room just reading. It was liberating to say the least,and im glad i read it, it is such a good love story!

I guess that my summer consisted of a lot of work time.

I got called to be the dance committee co-chair, which is something i have wanted for a long time now, but im glad i got in now, i'm definitely ready to take on the responsibility!

My friends are awesome, i've been getting really close with friends that live far away, so it sucks, thankfully for skype (find me: mayradlovesu) it saves the distance.i guess i've learned this summer that you have to just be responsible and get things done, you can't just leave things on the backburner and after 5 years, realize that you have waisted time doing nothing. In the end, i know that the memories i have made with my friends will never leave me, but i don't want to live my future based on memories of the past, i want to keep making new ones. And i have to take leaps and be afraid but take the risk so that i can become a better person. :)

ah. this summer could've been better. but im glad it's going the way it is now. <3>

mayra d.

living should be easy.

2010-06-01T00:51:00.000-07:00

So this weekend was quite a learning experience. i did something ive never done before, and will probably never do again. :) . so due to my constant state of high energy streessssfulll blah blah blah of a life, i findmyself unwinding in music all of the time. Because of this wonderful addiction, i find so many songs that have short lyrics that relate to my moment in life oh so well! :) here's some lyrics, with the song and artist right before! :) these songs will probably be on my playlist. if not, look them up! theyre GREAT musicians! OH, speaking of music! I went out to silverlake with derek tonight, it was rad! we were only there for about an hour, it was at this bar/lounge place and we saw War Tapes, they were really good and the bar was chill! of course, no drinking for us, we headed back home right after they were done, which was 11:30, got home by midnight! thats definitely a first for me!well, getting home that early from the city! anywho, he'res some music :) enjoy!

The Way the Lazy Do-Dr. Dog

May your thoughts be kind
May your knots unwind
May your dogs drink wine
May your days kill time

And may your fears go blind
As your regret rewinds
A little peace of mind
May you wake to find

It's just that time of the year
That holds you dear

Shadow People-Dr.Dog

I stole a bike from the 2ndd Mile
Saw a band play in the basement
I crossed the path of a friend of mine
And I know what that look upon her face meant
Something’s gone from her eye
Something’s gone wrong

You could be a woman or you could be a man
Wear the glove on the other hand
Or you could be twisted
Or you could be insane
Pushing the envelope against the grain
Just playing along (uuuuuuh)
Just playing along (uuuuuh)

And I got something on my mind
And I got voices on the other line
Saying hi, saying hello

Too Afraid to Love you-The Black Keys

My gears they grind
More each day
And I feel like
They're gonna grind away

And the city blocks
They drive me wild
They're never ending
Mile after mile

I just don't know what to do
I'm too afraid to love you

It's heaven on earth
In her embrace
Her gentle touch
And her smiling face

I'm just one wishing
That I was a pair
With someone
Oh somewhere

All those sleepless nights
And all those wasted days
I wish loneliness would leave me
But I think he's here to stay
What more can I do
I'm wringing myself dry
And I can't afford to lose
One more teardrop from my eye

its too hard to be bold sometimes. ive come to regret it. just because i fear every ounce of the consequences of being "bold." i hate this :/

summer time is here!

2010-05-24T23:35:00.000-07:00

Finally some time to rest! This semester seemed so easy at school but trully it was one of the hardest because i REALLY devoted all i could to my classes and work. It feels so great to finally be done and i'm excited for the summer to bring great things! This past week was a hard week, i must admit i was so ready to just walk out of work and run to the beach. I've been soo ademant about going out and having a good time at dance parties that I wore myself out. I was sick, and exhausted and stressed out and to top things off add a little bit of drama to my life and BLAH. we all know how much i hate drama. X( but this weekend made up for every ounce of BAD that was last week. Friday, i went to disneyland with my dear friend Ryan D. it was a tripple D attack!!! DENNY DELAO @ DISNEY!! hahah... here's a sneak peak at some rad photos!

Such a fun and chill trip to disneyland. After a fun day, we headed up to the Glendale dance and had the MOST fun i've had in a while! I definitely enjoyed the company and getting to know new people! There were SO MANY ppl at this dance, it was just like New Years but probably better! So Aaron is no longer gonna DJ our Beach cities dances, which totally bums me out bc that was honestly one of the only reasons i went, was to be with my good ole friends. I guess i still find it semi hard finding that "group" of close friends i once had. Of course, theyre married now so i cant complain, theyve moved up in life and im so happy for them! :) I just miss their company! anywho. we all had a blast. it was at this crazy industrial site in South El Monte (ghetto) haha but they pulled it off SO well. good music, i was dancing all night sweating my heart out. heres a few pictures of the night..

That dance was too good for words. I love every second of being there, idk why. i just felt like i was having such a good time, running around dancing with different people, having a legit good time.

Saturday rolled around and i had to work all night but after wards i met up with Stacy and Diana who i used to hang out with in high school and we ended up going to our friend Jason's Bday party! So many people from high school were there it was so nice to see everyone and kind of catch up. People change so much after high school, some for such better, and some just stay the same :) but im glad the people i know are who they are, because theyre great no matter what! here's a picture of the hottie bday boys and us girls!

It was so rad to chill with these kids! Even though our lives have gone towards different paths and stuff, i still love em! :)

Lastly, this sunday my friend Cynarra decided to get baptized :) i met her about a month ago at a party, invited her to church, she came and just kept coming and loving it! I was honored to speak at her baptism about the holy ghost, you could just feel all the love in the room and really see how it has brought her happiness. its really awesome to see someone come unto christ and really want to change, to see that happen to her was amazing!here she is. right after her baptism with derek and i :)

you can see where all of my excitement comes from. of course sunday was just fantastic. I love going to church so much. It was the first sunday i had off in over 2 months so it was really nice to finally get to sit in and conversate with people about the gospel. Im so in love with it its insane.

I have so much on my mind lately its driving me insane.. ive found myself SO scared to fall for someone, because im so scared to open up and get it all back. if that makes sense. maybe im looking into the wrong face, because its breaking my heart slowly, but its happening. theres so much to feeling like you have to hide your feelings because of that crazy fear of rejection. im right there. ive been right there my whole life and i have no idea how to EVOLve.ive lost sight of how to take a risk when it comes to really liking someone, enough to want to tell them but im so afraid, im so afraid of what he'd do to my little bandaged heart.

I need to take more risks and grow up, because i've slowly started to realize that without taking that ONE simple risk, im going no where, that without taking a leap of faith, the things that coulve developed will be left unspoken, and thats far worse. Somehow, ive got to let it out and grow some. Its just a matter of time.... well im off to bed.

M... y... L...O...V..E...L...Y... random shenanigans.. :D

2010-03-16T22:46:00.000-07:00

"OOH OH! i want some more... take a bite of my heart tonight..."<3NEON TREES

so life is fun, i guess... things seem to be in a bit of a routine at the current moment, which i hate with a passion...

but its okay. :) i live through all the annoyances that life can bring sometimes.. hahahah... now i just sound like a brat, but im kidding... so i have an interview in the AM.. im pretty excited :)

i'm applying at the ABC SCHOOL DISTRICT to be a paraeducator :) hopefully things go GREAT!! :) id LOVE to work with kids again... :)

anywho...

life is peachy. my grampy is here from mexico :) its soo great to see him doing so much better, even from the day he got in to now, he's progressed! Cancer is a sucker! and im glad he punched it out of him! :)

family is fun, im so greatful for the family i have, and the relationships i have with every single one of them! :) nothing in the world can compare to the family i have!! :)

well.. love is love, war is war.. fight for the free and feed the needy!

have a bEAUTIFUL day! :)

<3>mAyra D.

top 10!!!!

2010-03-01T01:02:00.000-08:00

bahahhaha....

so i came across the amazing idea while reading my rolling stones magazine today that I should SOOO make a TOP 10 Celebrity Hot list!!! :) so after abo

ut 30 minutes of thinking over whos really on my top list, i have come across some of the Most

attractive men in Hollywood... i know.. a little crazy, a little silly, but hey, they're wicked hot! SO ENJOY! :)

yaowza!!! Chase Crawford...

you cant stop the beat with Mr. Zack Efron!
the boys of Carolina Liar.. :)

mmm...John Mayer...

yum yum Penn Badgley
oooo hello Jared Leto!! :D
mmmm me likey some Bryce Avary!
seriously, mouthwatering... Paul Walker

so yea. basically. my first so called "celebrity post" hahahah... :)

its so great to look through the world and see such attractive men out there, but im looking for something more than just the looks you see on an average day, im looking for a man full of gospel, love for christ, humility,attractiveness and amazingness all tied into one.. :) hahaha...

have a great day :)

<3emm.dee.

unexplainable. unbelievable.

2010-02-15T22:31:00.000-08:00

scream.

let all your fears out.

let them all fly into the sky

with every ounce of regret of forgetting to say "i love you"

you vanished.

and are now gone,

without a simple explenation

of what happened.

i miss you.

SOOO SOOO much.

i cannot belive it ended that way.

i am SO sorry for not answering your cries,

or even a simple goodnight.

im sorry baby of mine.

you will never be forgetten

you were my best friend.

i love you zoe girl...

i miss you most bisquit.

this wasnt fair.

<3>

rip my angels.

just fyi. both of these GORGEOUS doggies were killed tradgecly last week. we believe a racoon got into the back yard early monday morning and just got in with them.. unfortunately they both are gone, Zoe completely vanished but her blood stayed behind. sorry for the greusome details, its just what happened to my loves... :(

i love you Jesus Christ...

2010-01-24T00:11:00.000-08:00

Jesus Christ i LOVE YOU YES I DO....

man oh man, it has surely been a pretty good 2010. Nothing TOO exciting but i think im back to normal after being beat up kinda bad in 2009... im learning that you have to set things out and plan them for a while, you can't ALWAYS be spontaneous in life specially when its about your future... i guess there are a few things that are supposed to be spontaneous, but with school and work, you gotta plan! So that's what this year is going to be for me... im hoping to get through some amazing classes and ace them all... and at work, i want to move up and show the big bosses what im really about! :) i want to grow, i want to learn and i want to prepare for whatever comes my way in the future. of course there is someone there backing me up full force, and that is why i love him so much... :) Jesus Christ I LOVE YOU :) man, the gospel of Jesus Christ is so true, its insane how amazing it feels to have the love of christ constantly keep you content! Every single experience, i have had him by my side and im so greatful for that! :)anywho...

life is good... last night i went to the avalon and saw steve aoki & plum Dj's... it was 2L2Q.

i love electro, and the whole scene is fun, but scary! heres some pictures of the night... video to come soon! :)

let the new year begin...

2009-12-30T20:44:00.000-08:00

this year was fun, a lot of time spent developing my personal relationships, friendships and overall social abilities... haha... ive learned a lot from different people this year, and im really greatful for it. I fell in love, i fell out of love, i gained friends, i lost one, but this year taught me A LOT. It taught me that through all of the circumstances we face in life, we still have hope for a new day, a new month, a new year, a new something! Although heartbreak hit this year, so did every other emotion in the book, OVERWHELMING happiness, unforgetable laugher, the feeling of new friends, new interests, new things. Im greatful for my HF, and the amazing plan he designed that keeps each person safe! I'm soooo greatful for this year, because without the things that happened in 2009, i wouldnt have grown like i did...

I really hope to get fit this next year, i know i lost a few pounds this year, but i want to be FIT. i want to work out more, i want to be healthier...

i dont really know what im hoping for in 2010, but its a new beginning,

so whatever the wind blows my way, i'll greet with open arms, as long as it's something that will make my life happier and full of more fun!!

Happy new year!

<3>

dwindling in the moonlight.

2009-11-19T01:45:00.000-08:00

Fear not to do good my sons,

for whatsoever ye sow

that shall ye also reap.

therefore

if ye sow good

ye shall also reap good for your reward

Therefore

fear not

little flock

do good

let earth and hell combine against you

for if ye are built upon my rock

they cannot prevail.

D&C 6:33-34

may your heart be open to the love that Jesus has for you, no matter what life may bring you.

Theres always hope, even if its only small hope, its presence is always there.

have a beautiful day.

fixed.

2009-11-17T22:13:00.000-08:00

fixed

on your smile

fixed

on your lips

fixed

on your random laughter

fixed

on your essence

fixed

on your presence

fixed

on your silly face

fixed

on my hearts embrace.

its a new way to ride,

and im digging every second of it.

i like you.

just a little bit more than average.

downer.

2009-11-10T00:28:00.000-08:00

sadness.

it fills your soul sometimes.

things arent as easy as you wish they would be

no one seems to really listen anymore

just pretending.

colors.

the sunset brings the darkness

but on the way there, the sky is filled with colors

this world is different

just like the colors of the sky.

people.

they dont trully listen

they just say what they want to hear

they conform

they become you because they want to be you

its never original to steal

specially the colorful personality of a friend

coverup.

like make up but you know its just temporary

things go back to the way they were before

when no one else is there to see u remove it

but me

glisten.

show your true colors when you are really YOU

downer poem.during downer times.

ill be the one to show you the way...

2009-10-26T01:25:00.000-07:00

so life has just been a big balloon of FUN! :) things are just going really good with work and school! im getting really good grades in both my classes, at work, i could be doing a little better, but im working my behind off. literally. ive lost a little weight (i think) ive been out and about every day, dancing, roaming the streets of LBC listening to some amazing music.going to shows, making new friends, discovering hot new boys (that i cant have) hahah... but i can dream.

so i think im gonna go for it and apply for byu summer session. honestly i feel like i should be up in utah for some reason.. maybe to find my ec, maybe to live in surroundings of a bunch of lds folK or something. we'll see though, it all depends on what my HF wants. well, life is grAnd, things couldnt be better right now, im stuck in a "good routine" that i really like. no boy drama, or stressors in life, so im just gonna chill and have a blast with life :) justin and i are still cool friends, which rocks, bc he was my friend before, so im glad we kept the friendship after. yay! well... its late, i should be asleep. so i will be in 5 minutes...

here's my mini spiritual moment of the day.

remember that "God always provides safety for the soul"so you're set no matter what happens in life....

and thats because we have the savior in our lives. no matter what we're going through, we are all in a wonderful situation.nothing can bring us down, we are on a divine path thats leading us to glory and goodness as long as we live the gospel of Jesus Christ....

i love you guys. and i hope your life is blessed with goodness and happiness.

:) have a great night.

<3>

utah Pictures...

2009-10-11T00:22:00.001-07:00

here are some pictures from utah, not in decending order, if anything, its the ending to the beginning... enjoy!

sad day.. farewell ryAn.

my favorite..
Tabernacle! :)
we went to the OTHER side :)
chEESE
loved everY second of it!
confrence.rain or shine!
tired at 2 am..
my NEW SHOES!
FOLKY! :) :) :) :)
this is robroy!
typical!
jiggabojangles..he's our newest fRiend!
DJ Ryan D.this kid rocks!
a. wallll m.dEEE
grass roots!
hey whats up!
pit stop!
hahahhahaha...
goood hair for 4 am!
utah was a BLAST! i cannot wait to go again! im sure it will be sooner that we go, so im super stoaked!! have a great nigHHT!

woAh utaH!

2009-10-11T00:04:00.001-07:00

oh goodness... so utah was a flippin BLAST! :) we set out to the state of ootah at 4 am! Robbie, alyssA and i were super stoaked to head out! i literally ran outside, ready and set for the glorious roadtrip we had ahead of us! so we drove into the day, it was super dark at first --"its like driving at night time"--hahah.. before we knew it, we were at stateline and were so ready to ride the supercoaster at buffalo bills, BUT it was only 9 am and the rollercoaster was closed..booo hoooo hooo.. so we headed to VEGAS! we drove down the strip.. then headed to UTAH!! before we knew it.. we were in ST GEORGE! we pit stopped for lunch at no where else but CAFE RIO!mmmhmmm..we got some sweet service from this man Aaron, definitely made our day! so then..the 4 hr drive to PTOWN!! we passed by the Y up on the mountain hills, got to Highland where alyssa's awesome fam bam was letting us crash at and chillared for the night! (sorry for my vocab, its somethin else).. anywho.. chilled at home that night, walked the dog, caught up with family and just had an amazing time! Friday came and went too fast! we went out to BYU and walked the campus! we met up with ELDER FRALEY! wooop woop ! he and his gf took us all around byu and stuff, it was so nice! im applying for the summer session, im pretty stoaked! we'll see though.. anywho.. met up with the amazing RYan DeNNy! wat wat! then partied all night.. i guess i can just post the pictures bc this is already long and its only friday, so ill caption all the pictures k! :) enjoy!! loves loves loves!!

:)

FORMULA DRIFT...

2009-09-24T01:04:00.000-07:00

goodness gracious, right now would be the perfect time to find the perfect boy who would love to go spend a whole afternoon watching cars drift... im super stoaked and bummed all at once because on october 17th the formula drift finals are taking place...Not familiar with formula drift? check it out bellow! it will blow your mind! I guess i couuld buy the tickets and just ask someone to go with me.. or give it to someone for his birthday? and drag him along..hahaha... i just wannna see cars go super fast!! :)

thats some serious racing there... i REALLY WANNA GOOOO....gahhhh.... ! im going!

things to come...

2009-09-21T01:07:00.000-07:00

So this past week was SUPER FUN! :) goodness i had a blast, i guess you can say it was a bittersweet with some extra sugar.. i feel bad for feeling so good about how things are going.. i hope that makes sense..but ive hung out with so many people ive neglected for a while and it felt good to finally catch up! made new friends, danced till i was tired! went to the temple :) prayed for council, moving to Utah soon? maybe.. thats what seems to be calling my name i guess... but im not sure yet. i gotta get school situated firsT! and pay off debt.. nani and i went on a fun bike ride around downtown bellflower friday night, it was sooo fun! we took our pups, Zoe and Lady. They're such troopers! i love doggies...the puppies are opening there eyes, soo stinking cute! :) well check out these pictures!

Thursday Temple day's!

finally on a real boat..but it never moved :(
cheeze snot...
these glasses suit me perfect!

<3>

i FINALLY bought a Fedora..
zoE girl..<3 onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_YovNsPbesW4/Src1LEbY0OI/AAAAAAAAAKE/GB2muVZwXXY/s1600-h/IMG_6111.JPG" style="text-decoration: none;">things are so crazy sometimes! life is so unexpected when you are just having a good time...the feeling that was gone for a while has returned, and im SOO happy that i have it back... <3>

you can make the pathway bright...

2009-09-16T23:51:00.000-07:00

You can make the pathway bright,
Fill the soul with heavens light,
If theres sunshine in your heart;
Turning darkness into day,
As the shadows fly away,
If theres sunshine in your heart today.

If theres sunshine in your heart,
You can send a shining ray
That will turn the night to day;
And your cares will all depart,
If theres sunshine in your heart today.

You can speak the gentle word
To the heart with anger stirred,
If theres sunshine in your heart;
Tho it seems a little thing,
It will heavens blessings bring,
If theres sunshine in your heart today.

You can do a kindly deed
To your neighbor in his need,
If theres sunshine in your heart;
And his burden you will share
As you lift his load of care,
If theres sunshine in your heart today.

You can live a happy life
In this world of toil and strife,
If theres sunshine in your heart;
And your soul will glow with love
From the perfect Light above,
If theres sunshine in your heart today.

i heard this song be sung in the most angelic and beautiful way ever possible back in april. i remember balling my eyes out because of the amazing spirit i felt that day, i didnt want to leave Utah, and im kind of scared, and excited to get that same feeling again this next time. I know it will be in different circumstances, but the spirit is the MOST BEAUTIFUL feeling i have ever felt in my entire life, i think that's when you know you love someone too,when the spiirit is THAT strong. i went with Justin last time, and i must admit, feeling in love and feeling that spirit was beautiful, but im sure that feeling will be exactly the same, because ill be with people i love. I just cant wait, i really really cant...

friends forever!

2009-09-16T00:21:00.000-07:00

so this week has been quite interesting. i guess you can say i had a change of heart, and im glad things have become the way they are now.. im glad i know that ill still have him as a friend, because thats what mattered the most to me, our friendship! cool beans! :) so im super excited for things to come though, it just seems like something out there is ready for me, like the workd of UTAH!! :) hahaha... im going to CONFRENCE again! im soo excited! im gonna try and make it every single time! im not being selfish, im taking advantage of an AMAZING opportunity! sitting in the confrence center was the COOLEST experience ever. Pretty modern way of the times of Christ when he spoke, would be this amazingness!! i love Utah, i hear it might snow, which would be super cool! but at the same time, ican go for some sunshine! :)

these past few months have been rollercoastered in my heart, and im so glad to move forward with certain feelings, and im glad that HF has a plan for me. It has helped me all along, even if i knew i didnt want this to happen a few months ago, it has, so i must get over it and move forward, which surprizingly is much easier than i thought it would me.. i guess HF wouldnt council us on wise decisions if he didnt think it was for the better right? right :) okay. love you all :)

-Mayra

taken aback.

2009-09-14T09:59:00.000-07:00

it's been two whole years
since you and I shared fears
two thirty am
talking till sleep inside that diner
and now in your eyes I can't find you

sorry that I'm taken aback
but how I am you never ask
and I don't need such sympathy
but a care would be so woah woah
nice to have once in a while
you mean more to me than I could ever tell
so sorry that I'm taken aback
but I just can't help it

small tale be just right
holding onto what we have inside
but now it's never there but should I admit
do I believe that I too am the culprit
and in your eyes I can't find you

sorry that I'm taken aback
but how I am you never ask
and I don't need such sympathy
but a care would be so woah woah
nice to have once in a while
you mean more to me than I could ever tell
so sorry that I'm taken aback
but I just can't help it

someday this will go away
and eveything I am will just leave and fade
and I hope then you will understand
it's not everything I am my dear only friend

so sorry that I'm taken aback
but how I am you never ask
and I don't need such sympathy
but a care would be so woah woah
nice to have once in a while
you mean more to me than I could ever tell
so sorry that I'm taken aback
but I just can't help it
oooooo oh oh
oooooo oh oh woah

oooooo oh oh
oooooo oh oh woah

things change,and ill be better over time. its just hard at the beginning of things.im single, selfless and ready to serve..so if you needme, i have time.. i have all the time in the world...

puppies, a sick dog and more...

2009-09-11T00:35:00.000-07:00

Biscuit, my dog, had her puppies yesterday. She gave birth to 3 puppies, one of which was born dead. I'm pretty sure she had major complications because her stomach was as hard as a rock this morning. We took her to the vet only to find out that she still had a puppy in her stomach, she was in so much pain it was rediculous. We couldnt afford the procedure, so we brought her home and she gave birth to the dead puppy, it was so sad, she was really sick and upset after. Alyssa (THANK YOU) came over and fed the puppies while I got ready for work. but my awesome neighbor took really good care of them while i was working, then when my parents came home they gave her penicillin which helped a ton! :) It was a long day, and really sketchy, i didnt like the vibe of it at all, but i did good at work, made our nightly numbers which was amazing! life is grand outside of small stressors, Justin and I are happy, and thats really all that matters :) well, heres the puppies.. hope you think theyre awesome.. we have yet to name them, theyre both girls... chloe is cute.. too close to zoe thougH...

Fire Season :(

2009-09-03T01:10:00.000-07:00

life is just GOOOOD.. ive been out and about a little more with friends lately! It's been

such a good learning experience for me, in my relationship, bc i feel like i can miss him more,

and we have so much more to catch up on when we see each other! it's amazing! i love him, and I

dont exactly love missing him, but it makes me realize how important he is to me in my life..

I went Rollerskating with Sean and Jill and a few other aWESOME people this weekend..heres

some way rad pictures of Saturday nIGHT!

newlyweds, toosh grabbin.

the entire posse!

sillly faces

wanna race???

Holy Man! LA is on Fire! this past saturday, some fires broke out in the LA National forrest, but instead of being behind the Mountain backdrop, it was on the south side of the mountains! I was driving down the 605 in Long beach and you can s

ee the flames from the fires, as if it were only 5 miles away! So crazy! I guess the Flames got up to 80 ft! holy maccaronni!here's some pictures ive taken off LA times, or taken myself... its so sketchY!

definitely not so good!

Hello Fireman!

Future Justin of America :)

Yikes!

super cool, NOT!

well that's how bad california has looked lately..

kiss kiss...BIG KISS!!! <3>

Pictures of new fun times..

2009-08-26T16:02:00.001-07:00

"all I see is your face.....all i see is your smile..."

i love this kid.

late night bike rides.
alyssa! with our Relief Society cake..
hola sol.
sometimes, life just sucks, but when its good, its good....

new things are happening..

2009-08-25T23:55:00.000-07:00

man can life just stress you out sometimes, its rediculous. I think this summer turned out to be something i didnt think it would be, full of work :( i didnt have as many long Car rides down PCH at 1 pm, i didnt go to the beach as often as i hoped to, i didnt ride my bike along the coast, okay, i lie, i went once.. i fell out of loops, i lost friends, i became stress. and man, do i HATE stress.. i cant live like this, i really cant! sometimes i feel so alone, like im the only one seeing things the way they are; im wrong obviously. so many things happened this summer, and i wanted to be a part of every single one of them. thats, of course, impossible. But i blamed it on one thing, and i cant blame it on that all the time, because its my fault too... done with that rant..

Kings of Leon are so soothing in such a different way. I guess its because it reminds me of times of old, times of sitting in a Ranger, driving down Clark, listening to Justin sing his lungs out to them. Of course he's still singing these tunes, but i dont get to enjoy them as often anymore. so these past few weeks have been rather interesting. I went to San Diego 2 weekends in a row, meanwhile Justin was in Mexico City, visiting his mission. Went with my friend Alyssa. The first weekend was seriously such a good time! the second weekend was rather bust than fun. But church time was way rad! met some San Diego cool kids :) it was fun! Ryan was way rad for letting us crash at his house and crash his parties for a minute.. no c-blocking for sure...hahah.. but here are some of my favorite pictures of down there... subtitled stories too...

sleepy in a burrito

ysa confrence
i miss you kiss kiss.
stranded..literally.

neon tree's (very awesome band)

with Ryan and Mitch at Rock-a-thon
Alyssa and I

there's a few, im pretty bad at posting on this thing.. well, today i went to the relief society dinner, caught up with some people, and got to know some others! i love socializing so much! i wish thats all i had to do sometimes, to be well off! haha.. just hang out and make people happy and stuff... at least thats my goal in life.. but i know there's certain people out there that can never be pleased, no matter what...

i really miss something, i dont know what it is, but i miss it... and i miss it a lot. i feel like something is misssing lately, and i think i know what i can be, but i swear i thought its been there through all of this throughtout the time.. i dont know, but a lot of praying will be done within the next few days, to figure out what's going on, so i can fix it..

i love you all... have a great night..

a new beginning.

2009-08-03T00:27:00.000-07:00

Howdy Rowdy Crowdy! :) so here i am, i havent posted a blog in a long time. Things havent really changed, my mother is out of the hospital, she's actually in Las Vegas right now, how exciting. I made my quota this month, thanks a lot to the wonderful people i work with for helping me! Justin and I, still going on! Yup yup yup! Sean and Jill got married!! Im so happy that they were that happy, man, someday ill have my turn! until then, im gonna take my time with things! Ive been pretty crabby lately, im not sure what is causing it, but sometimes im just like, blah. like i need to spice things up a bit more. I havent been dancing in what seems like wayyy too long, thank goodness there's something spectacular going on this next week!The YSA Confrence is this next week, there's also this event called Hard Summer going on, its like a huge huge huge dance party with all sorts of amazing kinds of dancing going on! Im sad that Sean and all of the amazing people i used to once dance with will no longer be able to. Sean starts Dental school in a month, for a whole 3 years! its gonna be intense, and being married is gonna be fun for them though!Theyre so sillY! so work is good, im honestly kind of ready for a new adventure. I dont really like feeling sooo pressured to make sales goals during a sucky economy! it really sucks!

So next week Justin is going to Mexico, FOR A WHOLE WEEK! friday through NEXT sunday! what the heck am i gonna do? Have the time of my life thats for sure :) hahahah..jk... im gonna miss him for sure, he's

like my bff! He's so silly, he bought this new UFC Fighting game and its actually really fun! I wrote David Witt yesterday, i miss that kid. Seriously, i honestly have misplaced all of my friends out in the far ends of the earth. Vanessa and Ty are all up in Utah, Davids in Louisianna, Sean and Jill are gonna be living in Pasadena now, and Alyssa is in Canada. I need more local friends, its rediculous! Well, im off to bed. Have a great nighT!

2009-07-02T01:00:00.001-07:00

HOWDY!!! oh goodness i havent been on this thing in forever! I guess i treat this as a Journal than an actual "blog." Well so much has happened in the last few weeks, ive had some pretty crazy things go on in my life that have stressed me out pretty badly, but thankfully, im good! Well work has become a lot easier recently! i no longer feel like i constantly need to reassure myself of what im doing because ive done it a dozen times already and i'm getting comfortable and better at it! :) It makes me really happy to see that things are finally starting to work out at my job, i honestly enjoy it a lot now, opposed to when i first got the new manager position and was screwing up left and right! that, was not cool AT ALL! :( but now, with the help of my amazing manager, ive got it all under control!:) except for the lack of people actually coming into our stores lately, this recession is beginning to hit the home front! And I dont like it! :(

Well, theres more stuff that has happened, my mother dearest was in the hospital for a whole 2 days last week, it was pretty bad! So a few weeks ago, i guess my momma started feeling somewhat faint and stuff at work.She works as a postal carrier, delivering mail and stuff, so you can see how that sort of job can be strenious on a 53 yr old woman. Well, one day, it got pretty bad so she went to the doctors and found out she had high blood pressure. She needed to take a few days off to rest and feel better, but better didnt come. So last wednesday, she THOUGHT she had an appointment with the cardiologist BUT she didnt, feeling sick still, she decided to go to the doctors so that they can see whats going on. While she was going up to the doctors, she started to feel pressure on her chest and the doctor read her BPM and it was at a whopping 200! Usually, your BPM are like 90-100 relaxing and can get to 180 + per exercising, but my mom was sitting down. She dosed off a little and somewhat fainted so they called the paremedics and she stayed in observation for a WHOLE 2 DAYS :( she's all better now, she even went to the cardiologist today, and they told her she was fine, just something that can occur when your arteries are a little clogged up, so they gave her a ton of medicine she has to take from now on, phew! thanks for all the prayers sent out though, they definitely work!! :)

Justin and I are still strong! :) its been ALMOST 6 whole months! this is my longest relationship yet, and im so in Love with this kid! :) he completes me for sure! :) we went to an 80's Prom on saturday night out in Laguna! it was fun!!Our Friends Kaci and Chris got engaged that day! her ring is rediculous! I keep joking with justin about what are baby's names are gonna be... Dane Jer Asendorf :) hahaha... wouldnt that be hilarious...i guess its hit that time in the relationship where you kind of start to wonder if this is the person you are gonna marry, or if these past few months have been fun, but nothing has come out of it. I think we both mutually agree that it would work, if marriage is next, then we're getting there someday, but we're enjoying the trip, not speeding at all, if anything, we're in the slow lane stuck behind the big rig but we're gonna get there someday...like he say's "hopefully." I guess its different

when you come from a situation like his, where marriage was already in the works, but the relationship was doomed for failure...we've surpassed the hurdle of "arguing and fighting" we never fight, we

get frustrated and may argue a bit, but we always always communicate our feelings, and i honestly think that's what keeps us so strong! His twinsie is coming down from Utah next week. Im sooo excited for all the fun adventures that are headed our way next week, his sister in law kim is hilarious, and we all had a BLAST in Utah so, im hoping for that same energy, Plus we have so much in store for them is redunkulous! :)

Well, im dang tired..im going to bed!!

<3mayra

why do you bother me so?

2009-06-13T00:35:00.000-07:00

Do people seriously understand what the heck they say sometimes, or what they feel is "right" really means.there are sooo many things going on in society right now that are just driving me insane!! Being a more conservative "republican" who values morals and goodly living, it drives me "A" WALL when you see people fighting for something that is seriously not good.

EXAMPLE 1:ABORTION

Okay, so this is probably the most debated moral issue that drives me NUTS!!! i understand that in certain circumstances, abortion is the only option a woman has to save her life, or her babies life;if medical reasons occur, im for whatever will SAVE A LIFE. Either mother or child, BUT since high school, i have known numerous girls who used Abortion as a form of birth control. WHAT THE FREAKING HECK!!! #1, stop being a dirty slut and having sex, so that you dont get pregnant, and save a freaking baby fetus from being denied THE RIGHT to a life, and your own life, because abortions im sure are wayyyy risky. I dont understand though, the people who fight for this so hard, how they can seriously convince themselves that taking a precious life, A BABY, how that can be right, its DISGUSTING! So gross, so gross. If you KNOW that you cant afford to have a child, then practice safe sex, dont go getting an abortion bc you messed up and drank too much that night, and you have 5 different men who could be the babies daddy, thats your mistake for not being aware of your body. not the baby you carry....

EXAMPLE 2:gay marriage+REligious fighting

okay, now, very touchy issue, bc i have TONS of homosexual friends, who i LOVE with all of my heart, and being that i am a very active member in the Mormon church, and helped with the yes on 8 campaing, i know that this may be too much. but the only thing that bothers me about the whole fight of prop 8 is how the no side is being soooo hypocritical towards christians, and people of faith... i HATE how they are trying to push beliefs, that we dont agree on, on us, and our future generation. I know that this might sound "intolerant" but im not, i am aware of everything, i just have MY OWN BELIEFS, so does this make me a Bigot? or any other dirty words you like to call us for sticking to our MORALS/VALUES/ BeLIEFS?? it shouldnt right, because the first amendment gives me the freedom of religion, speech and press, so thats what i believe, that marriage is for one man and one woman, on a religious level. grrr....

EXAMPLE 3:OBAMANATION

SInce when did our president become a celebrity, i have hope that this wonderful looking black man will fulfill most of the things he said he would, so that he doesnt go down as the black president who lost it, bc thats not cool, i hope he succeeds.BUT what the heck, hes all over like entertainment news like hes the freaking lead actor in our new summer hit. c'mon people, hes NOT A GOD, in no way is he near that, he is just fulfilling his role as our nations leader... don't even call him a God.

Life, oh man, sometimes i dont get the people in this country, and how we have swirved so far from being a clean and beautiful nation, into this disguisting transgendered (transformed) nation. WE have lost it, seriously, im scared to have children in this kind of society, because of all of the crap they would have to face with drugs, alcohol, prostitution, intolerance to conservative values, because the world seems to be getting way tooo liberal lately, SERIOUSLY, and the media is the cause for that. Its cool to be liberal, and to stand with no morals, because with that, you can do whatever you freaking want, with the help of this government. BS.

sorry for ranting, ive just been frustrated with this world lately. haha...thankgoodness for my heavenly father and his wonderful inspiration and revelation that helps me get through all the hardships of life. I love him with all of my heart! :)

hope you have a great day

-Mayra

lucky.

2009-05-29T00:45:00.000-07:00

romeo take me somewhere we can be alone.....man, its insane how a person can change your life so much just by being present in it. ive never been happier, and i love the person that sits across the table from me on our wednesdates. ive never felt so comfortable with anyone else in my entire life, and for the FIRST time ever, i can actually trully say that i am in love with my best friend.. seriously though. ive never had such a strong connection with someone as i do with Justin. and i Know that i always tend to ramble about him on this thing, which to me seriously is kinda weird, i usually dont do these kinds of things, but its okay, he knows i write on this..hahaha.. this past weekend was a blast! :) i had both saturday and sunday off! Saturday was semi filled with adventure, kind of, haha.. justin and I went to one of my cousins Quinceanera after watching like 2 movies that morning, then we just slept on the couch. We shouldve gone rollerskating, but I was pretty pooped. Sunday was fun! Went to church all day then went to my nephews birthday bbq at my sisters house, saw the fam bam then went and watched Doubt it was okay i guess. it wasnt too like interesting... but whatever! Monday was Memorial Day! I worked in the morning then headed over to sean's. had a bbq then went to FHE where i bid on a few things, and won, for a service "missionary fund" auction.

SOOOO...something hilarious also happened that night.. okay okay, so this girl has known Justin like all her life right, they grew up in the same ward and all. SO i met her like over a month ago, shes in our ward now, but shes always kind of given me the stink eye seriously.well i had told Justin about it when she FIRST rolled her eyes at me, but it was no bigg-e to me, i was just like, Dude, she no likey me. i donno why! well, come to find out that she has a crush on him, which, haha.... is totally funny and fine with me, just keep ur hands off and ur good, i trust ya, i trust him. well, on monday, her true colors came out. We were saying farewell to all of our friends and she comes up and gives him a hug and is like, byee Justin, and I, in attempt to seriously befriend her, because ya know, your friends are my friends kind of thing, SO i say ... "hiiiiiiiiii :D" like being seriously nice, no likeattitude or anything, just sincere hello. Instead of saying hello back, she FLIPS HER HAIR and freaking gives me the DIRTIEST look a girl can give... haha... soooo, since Justin is standing right next to me, he see's it all, and is like... WOAH!!!!! Did that just happen?!?!?!?!? hahhahah... he looks at me with like the funniest look on his face, as i smile and say " i told ya so" hahaha.. and we leave...how rude though, i dont know anything about this girl, and I DONT JUDGE HER, i dont know her to judge her, but she doesnt look like a nice person whatsover... c'mon. It just really bothers me that she is doing these things without knowing the person I am. I know she likes him, and shes probably upset that he has a serious girlfriend, but if she continues to do this, sheMIGHT just loose him completely, not by my means either, he was really mad that she did that to me...

well, thats my week! I start working as a Manager on Sunday, im really excited but nervous all at once, hopefully i dont mess up TOO bad!! :)

i love you all!

the man they send to die, offers life.

2009-05-25T00:55:00.000-07:00

what a sunday, nothing is more precious than a good sabbath day. today, was a glorious one. its crazy how sometimes we tend to forget the most important things in life. i think recently ive been caught up in finishing school, and progressing at work and with my boyfriend that i have lost sight of the progress ive had with my savior. for a while i didnt read my scriptures at night, maybe a quick glance at something that made me happy, but no "in dept" reading. i literally lost my temple recommend, like i misplaced it somewhere, and i have nooo idea where it is, im just sad that i lost the first one i ever got, it is so important to me. i guess ill just have to go in and get another one, but it wont be the same as my first one. today i learned about myself, and the things i need to work on so that i can become a better person, and have eternal life. id really love to be with my family for ever. whoever my husband may be, id love to be with him forever!

so last year, the best year of my life so far, i joined the church, all thanks to these four boys to your left. Elder Seitz,Elder Folkersen,Elder Moncayo and Elder Orr. All amazing missionaries to the church, who taught me an immense amount of things about the gospel of Jesus Christ.Im so greatful for their hard work, and dilligence for the gospel,because without them, i would still be stuck in an idealistic world. i dont know if id be as happy as i am today. because im sooo blessed, sooo blessed! im so greatful to be a member of my heavenly fathers church, and to be able to recieve the many blessings he has, and to live worthy of those blessings, even when times are at their toughests, pulling forward in God speed and doing what is right is what i want to be found doing the day he comes again.

Ive been looking back to the things that i have accomplished this year, and boy, did i do good! for the first time ever, i finished all the classes i started with in the semester, so sad but so true!Sending off 3 great friends on missions, and more actually, has probably been the most bittersweet feeling ever. im sooo glad that Karen,Angela,Shatara,Krista,Catina,Stephanie and Ashley all decided to go out and serve the Lord this year, i hope and pray for their well being and progress wherever they may be in the world :)

well, i have to get to bed, its almost 2 and i work at night, thank goodness for naps, or else id already be dead asleep.

always remember who you are

and what you stand for.

let no one take that away.

-mayra

stress free is the way to be!

2009-05-21T14:43:00.000-07:00

Holy smokes! This week has BY FAR been the best week in a good while... for one, IM DONE WITH SCHOOL! well at least until next semester which isnt until august! Justin and I celebrated our 4 month anniversary last night, we went to lucielle's and had ourselves some bbq tri tip...hmmmmhmmm...it was way yummie!we then went to k1 speed, hoping to race some wicked fast indoor go-karts, BUT i got us lost, which always seems to happen when we go to k1, i was really mad at myself, because of course, i had a FEELING that it was at a certain turn, but i went straight insted, which took us onto a road, then took another wrong turn and by the time we found the place , it was closed :( so so saD! BUT we're gonna go again tonight! Justin is studying for HIS last FINAL right now, super stress case seriously, haha..im jk. hes good he'll do great, i know it, i know exactly how he feels, like he has no control over what is just about to go down, thats why studying is the smartest idea ever!

so ive come to a realization that i really love to do portrait photography a whole lot more than environmental photography.we went to our friend Derek's(seen to your left) party, where i went photo balistic! i actually took this

this picture of him, of course, i edited it a little, made it a little bolder and added a little outline on i photo. nothing really major on picture editing, bc i like to be able to know that I

took the picture, and if its a good one, editing should be small details to fix something up, right?hahah...

i took this picture of justin that night, id say its a good one yea? i think so, hes so darn attractive hahaha...its

so awesome, he's my best friend and im so greatful for that, and the ability to be able to tell him everything... i went to the mall to exchange a skirt that i hated! i dont know why i bought it, but i exchanged it for this AMAZING dress! on the way out i stopped by Regis where his mommy was getting her hair cut! it looked so cute :) its really cool to get along with his family. well, im hugry, and so, im gonna eat some food...

i love this kid.

oh and here's some more pictures i took that night...:)

mikey!!!

marlon!!
richard!
me and vanessa

Distant Memories...

2009-05-18T23:49:00.000-07:00

TIMES ARE A CHANGIN!

man! summer is just around the clock...24 hrs until im free from all school work for the next 3 months! im so excited, but at the same time, im so sad! Vanessa is officially in utah for the summer, next is David, he's leaving on his mission to Louisiana, which is sooooooo exciting and all, BUT im gonna miss him! 2 whole years without David Witt...why the heck am i not hanging out with him as much as id like to! Tylers going up to utah in like a month for school, and will probably stay up there until hes done with school, so this picture you see here, yea, there wont be another one like it for the next few years, bc although we have awesome friendships, were gonna be in different states for the next few years...these two lovebirds down there are getting themselves hitched on july 31st, which is

super amazing! im so happy that they found each other, this

was where they "remet" in december, and it all just progressed from there! :) theyre sooo perfect !:) these pictures are pretty dang old...i took them back in january at some HB party! man, do i miss those too! school sucks, it takes up so much time and takes all your social abilities out of reach, and that sucks!! the only free time i have i spend with justin, just bc its the only time we really get to hang out! It's officially been 4 monthS! wahooo....

dont we look so cute here..hahaha... that was a fun night! he held my hand for the first time (in public) this night, ricky and vanessa were very impressed! :) i love this kid!haha..yep. i do. i seriously cannot wait until 6 pm tomorrow night. i dont know what im gonna do, but i have a bucket full of sidewalk chalk, so im for sure gonna color on the floor with that stuff this summer...might go for bikerides..oooo, midnight bike rides!...get out on the beach and tan...i told justin i was gonna work out ever day this summer..hahah...i need to be serious about that one!im sooo excited for him and the whole chp thing he's going for this summer, i think hed be way better as a chp than a sherrif, more $$ and he'd get to go on car pursuits, aka, drive REALLY FAST on the freeway which is something that i know would make him the happiest! im just really excited to see him in that whole suit...hes so hot! hahahaha...

oh, so new stuff in life, i got a NEW CALLING at church!! :) im so excited, dave said it was an easy one, which is cool to me, but im just excited to be able to serve my Heavenly father some more! :)i had to work this sunday though :( that sucked big time..i have this saturday off though...we were gonna go to disneyland, but were just gonna wait for jared and kim to come down so we can all go together and FO FREE! i flippin miss that place soo much!

so vanessa is gone up to utah, shes going to Uof U!! which is cool i guess, i sure hope she doesnt get too bored up there.. bc when we went up to Utah, it was pretty boring, BUT we made the best of it all! :) i miss my friends, theres a party this friday, its gonna be a good and big one, which is what i like..i cannot wait, finals and all being done, im gonna have SO much time on my hands to just DANCE DANCE DANCE...maybe ill pull this outfit back out of my closet, i dont think ive worn this shirt since that night, but im gonna wear it. maybe, im sure ive gained some lb's since january, thanks stupid school...ugh...

things are a changin, but i know that theyre all a good change... i mean, school, school, mission, marriage(not me) are all processes of life that must happen, either one or the other, of course marriage=essential, but the other two have to happen, either one or the other...who knows...im just excited to start a fresh new summer season full of fun! :) oh it will be a great one...

goodnight :)

picture time.

2009-05-15T13:47:00.000-07:00

here i am.

in this wonderful world.

living life.

the best way i can.

we took a trip.

to bakersfield in march.

found a daisy filled hill.

and fell in love with it.

so,

we photographed it.

i and he

apparently were hippies

this day was such a blast, we took so many pictures up on that hill.

i fell in love with this moment, and these pictures.

i need to print this one out and frame it somewhere..yea, i need to.

Day 2.

2009-05-14T00:48:00.000-07:00

i shouldnt be awake right now, if anything, i shouldnt even be on this thing, i have a massive project due tomorrow and im sooo close to done, but im sooo dead tired..ive been awake since 5 am this morning. i got the pleasure to rearrange the store today, and make it look really good. i had some help from another manager of course, because im still the newbie that messes up at everything! :) after work i went and got my hair done, its just a tad bit shorter and the same color but just a little more "enhanced." then, i went to Justins and he and i finished up my art project! i sculpted the LA temple with wire :) its sooo awesome! :) We then went on a very short bike ride, due to my temper tantrum and fatigue, i didnt want to ruin the fun, so we went on a short one. Justin was very greatful of how i handled my "stress," i just stayed quiet and rode, it felt good :) and it was a nice break. Something came so unexpectedly today, and it made me sooo happy. sooo sooo sooooooo happy. :) i guess when something goes so right, it just keeps progressing.. i hope that this is how things continue, with progress and delight. because all i want in life is happiness,and i have had that in my life for quite some time now, and im sticking with him...

school will be over soon... and ill go on bike rides to the beach, and sing in the car while driving down pch, its gonna be grand, i can already smell the grass a changing... the winds blowing the ocean breeze in, and im so happy....

i love you.

goodnight.

Day 1.

2009-05-12T01:06:00.000-07:00

Ive wanted one of these so called "blogs" for a good while now...

i think itll definitely be a fun way to express myself to the cyber world through photography and all that other fun snazzy stuff i like to share! :)

today was okay, work is pretty fun, its hard though, theyre making me a manager, which is exciting, but i kind of doubt my abilitlies sometimes..i messed up today though, and i put myself down because of it...thankfully, i have a wonderful man that knows just how to cheer me up, Justin, te quiero muchO amor!

Hes just so freaking grand, seriously, ive found my match, well, for the time being, were gonna take things as they come, and enjoy them while we are here! :)its been very close to 4 months since we first went out on a date, that was such a fun night!!I remember like it was ayer ( yesterday) who knew things would work so great though, he is not only my amazing boyfriend, but my new best friend :) We were driving home on saturday morning, after a fun little bike ride to the carpintero building for boyscout breakfast at his home ward, and he was singing to Kings of Leon, Day old Blues, and just sounded so amazing, i like to listen to that song now, because that moment of him singing replays in my mind, and i get little butterflies... hes so awesome...

but anywho, were both sooo ready for school to be over, i think were definitely gonna go to K1 speed and celebrate, im sure ill kick his butt at it again for sure! hahah...

two more weeks and its serious summer time..

i have class in the morning, and as much as i feel like i can write so much more, i have to read some scriptures and get to bed... but enjoy some pictures ive taken over my photography lifetime... <3